Today is a truly disappointing day for me. Apparently I don’t have unbridled power in my new executive board position for school, and then at work I’m informed that I can’t write the law as I see fit and am bound by BOTH the state legislature AND pre-existing laws. (I know, right?)

The world would be a much better place if everyone just did what I told them to do. Can we just make this happen, please? I’ll be a benevolent ruler of all I survey…I promise! (Unless you bother me, in which case I’ll crush you beneath my feet and the last sound you hear will be the lamentations of your women. Other than that, I’m just an extraordinarily nice guy who likes to give hugs.)

Cupcake Wednesdays, for example, would be mandatory throughout the land. So would Ribs, Wings, and Beer Fridays.
And let’s not forget about the frozen margarita stands at all major bus stops. (How’s that for an incentive to use public transportation?)

Yes we can, world. Yes, we can.